How to Ease the Kindergarten Transition for Children with Learning Disabilities

The move from preschool to the ‘big school’ rarely goes off without a hitch for any child, but for one with learning disabilities, it can be especially challenging. How can you help? Try these ideas from Sarah Birnbaum, a special needs consultant in New York City.

Make it official. It’ll be easier for your child to accept the finality of leaving preschool if he has something tangible to hang on to. Make a Goodbye Book of photos, written as a story, and including a calendar showing the first and last days he spent there. 

Look ahead. Likewise, a Hello Book, heavy on visual supports (a.k.a. photos) will serve to get children excited about their new school and ease trepidation. It may be tricky to get pictures of the interior of the school before your child starts, but ask. If photo-taking isn’t allowed, ask if they have any images they could share showing representative classes or fun school events. You can also try the school or district website, as many have photos taken both inside and outside.

Make one (or two) visits. Visiting the elementary school is essential, either on a formal group tour, on your own (call the school first to set it up), or both. While there, keep your eyes open for distinguishing features your child can look for on the first day. If you point out the yellow monkey bars or the fish tank in the lobby, your child will feel more relaxed seeing those familiar things later. 

Set expectations. Kids will do better when they know what is expected of them. Flying by the seat of your pants may seem easier at first, but tends to backfire. Let them know what they must do each school day (within their capabilities, of course), such as packing lunch or laying out clothes the night before—and hold them to it. 

What About Your Transition?

Parent development doesn’t necessarily match child development, Birnbaum points out. Many parents of children with learning disabilities have as difficult a time with the kindergarten transition as their kids do—maybe even moreso. Birnbaum sees a sense of regret in some parents who come to her, of not wanting to accept the hand they’ve been dealt. “I’m reminded of that Talking Heads’ song…Where is that large car? This is not my beautiful house. This is not my beautiful wife,” says Birnbaum. “They’re struggling to let go of how things were supposed to be.” Her advice? Acknowledge your feelings or they’ll turn around and bite you. “Allowing yourself to fully feel them and move through them is the only path to being able to help your child. The system won’t help your child if you don’t.”